Myopia: Defend Your Childhood – Episode 144: Die Hard (1988) – The ESO Network

Well now! Pour yourself a stiff eggnog and relax by the fire with this Christmas classic as smoooooooth as Bing Crosby’s smacking hand. Bruce Willis? Woo! Alan Rickman! Yesss! REGINALD VELJOHNSON?!?!?!?!? FUCK YEA! We are not entering the debate as to whether or not this is a Christmas movie, but rather, is this the greatest of all time. Also, dear friends, thanks for all of you who supported Cineprov this year and I will see you in January! Join Larry (our founder and comedy writer for MST3K season 11), Evan (from Evan and Garrett Take On The World and 99x), […]

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Myopia: Defend Your Childhood – Episode 143: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971) – The ESO Network

“Take a look, count to three, come with me, and you’ll be in a world of Pure Imagination.” I remembered that without lyric sheets, this movie is a favorite so listen as we have a bit of a love fest we even talk the Tim Burton meh version! This week on Myopia: Defend Your Childhood, we ponder is Grandpa Joe the greatest con artist of all time? We watched Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971), he’s just straight up killing kids, right? Also, dear friends, if you like live comedy and want to support me, your host, come and watch […]

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Myopia: Defend Your Childhood – Myopia Mornings! Sailor Moon (1993-1994) – The ESO Network

Well hello! Welcome to Myopia Mornings, around here we like to watch cartoons and take the day nice and slow. However, today we are fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight, and never running from a real fight while we watch Sailor Moon (1993-94). We watched the original Japanese with subtitles, so none of that American censorship got in the way of the action! Also, dear friends, if you like live comedy and want to support me, your host, come and watch me do the joke’em’ups as Cineprov Ruins Childhood Memories! Join Larry (our founder and comedy writer for MST3K season 11), Evan (from Evan and […]

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Myopia: Defend Your Childhood – Episode 141: Dune (1984) – The ESO Network

Hello and Happy Thanksgiving! I hope you are preparing for or driving to a great meal! If not, I hope you are having a great day and we are getting you there. So we watched Dune (1984) and wow. I don’t think we could say it any better than the director himself David Lynch. “Dune, I didn’t have final cut on. It’s the only film I’ve made where I didn’t have. I didn’t technically have final cut on The Elephant Man (1980), but Mel Brooks gave it to me, and on Dune the film, I started selling out, even in the script […]

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Myopia: Defend Your Childhood – Episode 140: Escape from L. A. (1996) – The ESO Network

Well there, you know how the holidays seem fun and relaxing at first, but now that they are approaching, you just want to get away? Escape, if you will? Well, in honor of that (or, you know, just reaching), this week on Myopia: Defend Your Childhood, we watched the CGI-tastic film Escape from LA (1996), the sequel America clamored for (?)! Also, dear friends, if you like live comedy and want to support me, your host, come and watch me do the joke’em’ups as I riff over Santa Claus (1958) (AKA Santa vs the Devil) with Cineprov. Join Larry (our founder and comedy writer […]

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